Not so long ago, I went through the time of excruciating pain, misery that tears me apart from the inside. It hurts my heart, my soul, and even my body. It dried the life out of me. It makes me keep praying for death and thinking that if death doesn't come very soon, I might have to kill myself.
Nobody can really explain the experience of pain. It is like you are locked in that tormenting room alone. It's like you are grasping for breath and feel like you're about to die, but nobody else knows it and nobody else feels it. You are crying inside your soul, crying tears of blood. But no one sees it.
So death was very much on my thoughts for a period of time. I seriously prayed for it.
But then, I heard these people telling about what they had experience ....these people had been dead by suicide but then got a chance to return to their life on earth. One girl was abused and she was very depressed. She took a lot of pills to kill herself, But after she's been dead, she found that if she chose to die this way, she would have to walk inside a fog with all the depressive thoughts that tormenting her for a very long time. Death is not a way to end such misery. It will be prolonged, just in another dimension. Another girl shot herself, she went straight to Hell. She talked about this extreme misery, a feeling of being burned alive, a feeling of spiritual"dead" in her soul, no other pain in the world can be compared to such kind of extreme agony.
And both...were saved by our Lord. They were both given another chance to decide again. The second girl was also given the chance to experience Heaven, which is a total opposite to Hell. A place where there is only love and life and extreme happiness, pure happiness, absolutely no sorrow or pain of any sort.
And so I come to think. Well, life on earth can be a bit like Hell sometimes, but it is nothing compared to the real Hell itself. And there is nothing that will ever want more than meeting the Lord in Heaven and stay there forever. I will not risk any chance of falling into Hell and miss the chance for Heaven.
So I decide that I will stand through the pain on the earth. Sometimes it's a bit like Hell, but it's mild.
Just a mild version of Hell. Better to suffer here than in that realm of complete darkness.
And when the time comes, eternal bliss will be there waiting for me.
After I made that decision, peace overflowed me and tears filled my eyes. It must be the right decision.
Tuesday, 11 August 2015
Saturday, 2 May 2015
Spiritual Foods (Are you hungry?)
Last Sunday I've received some wisdom from going to a sharing group. It was spoken by a priest.
People are hungry and thirsty in spirits. This is the cause of many problems in the world today. We are hungry and empty inside. We try to fill ourselves with many things,
wealth, fame, power, knowledge, relationship etc. We all use different ways to "fulfill" our lives and that "empty" space in the soul. But the sad thing is, nothing can truly make us full.
As I was writing this post, I am experiencing one of this spiritual hunger. I feel jealousy and envy. And that means I feel that there is something missing in me and in my life, I want to have what others have in order to feel full and satisfied, and my mind is thinking that if I have something similar to what these people on the nearby table are having, I will feel happier in my life.Well, the truth is...I guess...once I have what they have, I will still somehow feel hungry again.
But here are real spiritual food. Once you eat them, you will be filled and will not have to struggle so hard in lives in trying to fill that emptiness.
I tried it. It works. At least, on the day that I ate most of these spiritual foods, I felt calmness and peace inside. I live my life easier and happier, because I don't have to be busy with my own needs or unhappiness.
So here...the spirtual foods. Try them.
1. Being kind to others/ loving others/ doing good things for others
2. Reading spiritual books /reading the Bible / reading God's word
3. Pray / Spend time connecting to God (There are many ways to do it. There are many kinds of prayers. Find one that fits you.)
4. Receive the Communion (Jesus said, I am the Bread of Life, those who come to me shall never hungry or thristy again.)
These four foods can help nourish the spirit and at least fulfilled most of the hunger and thirst inside me. But I believe one thing, I really do believe, that we human can never be truly "filled" until we are one with the Lord.
But from now until that day, I'll eat both physical and spiritual food so that my time on earth will be bearable and fruitful.
People are hungry and thirsty in spirits. This is the cause of many problems in the world today. We are hungry and empty inside. We try to fill ourselves with many things,
wealth, fame, power, knowledge, relationship etc. We all use different ways to "fulfill" our lives and that "empty" space in the soul. But the sad thing is, nothing can truly make us full.
As I was writing this post, I am experiencing one of this spiritual hunger. I feel jealousy and envy. And that means I feel that there is something missing in me and in my life, I want to have what others have in order to feel full and satisfied, and my mind is thinking that if I have something similar to what these people on the nearby table are having, I will feel happier in my life.Well, the truth is...I guess...once I have what they have, I will still somehow feel hungry again.
But here are real spiritual food. Once you eat them, you will be filled and will not have to struggle so hard in lives in trying to fill that emptiness.
I tried it. It works. At least, on the day that I ate most of these spiritual foods, I felt calmness and peace inside. I live my life easier and happier, because I don't have to be busy with my own needs or unhappiness.
So here...the spirtual foods. Try them.
1. Being kind to others/ loving others/ doing good things for others
2. Reading spiritual books /reading the Bible / reading God's word
3. Pray / Spend time connecting to God (There are many ways to do it. There are many kinds of prayers. Find one that fits you.)
4. Receive the Communion (Jesus said, I am the Bread of Life, those who come to me shall never hungry or thristy again.)
These four foods can help nourish the spirit and at least fulfilled most of the hunger and thirst inside me. But I believe one thing, I really do believe, that we human can never be truly "filled" until we are one with the Lord.
But from now until that day, I'll eat both physical and spiritual food so that my time on earth will be bearable and fruitful.
Tuesday, 28 April 2015
Five ways to connect to "the Vine"
John 15:5
I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
Since my teacher is sitting here with me while I'm writing this blog, it would be good to publish some of his teachings. (actually it's not 'his' teachings because he said it is what God directly teaches him. It is knowledge from God, not his own) My teacher often reminds me of the above verse as a way to survive in this world. He said that we need spiritual nourishment from God all the time, otherwise we will live like the dead. In all circumstances, if we connect to the "Vine", troubles will be gone and we will be all right. Jesus came to die on the cross so that we may have "life", but we also need to keep connecting to Him. Things will flow more smoothly. Our heart will have more peace. We will not lose our way.
However, if we make no effort to connect to the Vine, we will drift further and further away and will wither and die spiritually. The world will have power over us and we become slave to the world.
My teacher said there are five ways to connect to "the Vine."
1. Love
2. Faith
3. Obedience
4. Suffering
5. The Eucharist
Love-Jesus told us to Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself. (Luke 10:27) Love connects two beings into one. If we truly love God with all our heart and soul, we are one with Him. God resides in each human being, so if we love others, we also love "the essence of God" inside each person. As soon as we "love", the branch will immediately connect to the Vine, we will connect to God and recieve nourishment from Him right away. My teacher said that we can meditate on our love for God, whenever we feel that we love God, hold on to that love and express it more and more from your heart ("holding and expressing the love that you are"[from Love Without End by Glenda Green]), when a single emotion is expressed, our spirit will focus and concentrate on it. Finally your spirit will enter a trance and become one with God. The branch will completely connect to the Vine. Well, for basic level, praising God and expressing our gratitude to Him is also the way that we connect to the Vine and receive spiritual nourishment right away.
Faith- When we trust someone completely, we trust that person even more than we trust ourselves. God asks us to trust Him completely, to let go and let Him work His own way in us and in our life. When we trust God, we connect to Him. When we trust God, God lives in us and we lives in Him. When we trust God, we will be like Him. God can do anything, if we trust Him, we can do anything as well. My teacher said "Trust" is like "Love" in that it makes two beings connected into One. We can be one with God, when we trust in Him. It is a way that our branch will connect to the Vine. As soon as we decide to trust and believe comepletely in the Lord, tremendous joy would flow into our heart. We do not have to see before we believe, we just have to trust although we do not see it. 1 Peter 1:8-9 Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls. Miracles happen in such way. Miracles happen when we believe, when we trust...that is when our branch connect to the Vine, and we recieve "anything and everything" from Him. Luke 17:6 If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it will obey you. / Hebrew 11:1 Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.
Obedience- This means keep the commandments of the Lord. Jesus said "Follow Me" and that is what we have to do. Follow Jesus. Be good. Don't give our life to sins. Matthew 5:48 You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect. The Vine is holy, the Vine is clean, the Vine is white. If the branches are sinful, dirty, and dark, we can't connect to Him. Actually, that's the reason that Adam and Eve died from eternal life. They sinned. But Jesus has already provided the way that we can have life again. We accepted his salvation, and after that we keep His commandments. That's what Jesus said we should do. Obey Him and live according to His Words. John 15:7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. Be Good. Stay away from evil. Being holy may sound too difficult a thing to do, but we have to keep our life on one straight path in order to receive this spiritual nourishment. God will stay "in" us if we keep his temple holy. John 14:23 Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them.
Suffering- This may sound crazy but my teacher said it is for real. When we are in great pain, and we accept it with peaceful mind, our spirit will concentrate on the pain and enter a trance. The pain will no longer be painful because we share in the suffering of Christ. The pain will instead become an ecstasy. (Well, but I think this is for the high-level: the saints or those who are nearly saints) Carrying the cross is our duty. Jesus said "Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me" (Matthew 16:24) Accepting suffering is a way that we purify the soul, and when our soul is pure, the branch will connect back to the Vine. But the important thing is that we must accept everything with total surrender, without bitterness or anger, then the peace of the Lord will overflow us. The bible told us that we cannot avoid suffering if we are to live in Christ.
2 Timothy 3:12 Indeed, all who desire to live Godly in Christ Jesus will be persecuted.
The Eucharist - John 6: 53-57 Jesus said to them, “Very truly I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day. For my flesh is real food and my blood is real drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in them. This is the simplest and easiest way to connect to the Vine. The above quote should already speak for itself. Jesus has provided "Himself" so that we can have spiritual nourishment from God, that we can connect back to our Source of Life. Receiving the body of Christ in the form of Eucharist with faith and respect will nourish our spirit. If we refuse to receive Christ, then we will "wither" and "die" because we cannot escape from sin and the results of it. Roman 6:23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. As Catholic, it is best for us to get rid of our sin (death) first, then recieve Christ (life). That's why we usually go to confession before we receive the Communion.
I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
Since my teacher is sitting here with me while I'm writing this blog, it would be good to publish some of his teachings. (actually it's not 'his' teachings because he said it is what God directly teaches him. It is knowledge from God, not his own) My teacher often reminds me of the above verse as a way to survive in this world. He said that we need spiritual nourishment from God all the time, otherwise we will live like the dead. In all circumstances, if we connect to the "Vine", troubles will be gone and we will be all right. Jesus came to die on the cross so that we may have "life", but we also need to keep connecting to Him. Things will flow more smoothly. Our heart will have more peace. We will not lose our way.
However, if we make no effort to connect to the Vine, we will drift further and further away and will wither and die spiritually. The world will have power over us and we become slave to the world.
My teacher said there are five ways to connect to "the Vine."
1. Love
2. Faith
3. Obedience
4. Suffering
5. The Eucharist
Love-Jesus told us to Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself. (Luke 10:27) Love connects two beings into one. If we truly love God with all our heart and soul, we are one with Him. God resides in each human being, so if we love others, we also love "the essence of God" inside each person. As soon as we "love", the branch will immediately connect to the Vine, we will connect to God and recieve nourishment from Him right away. My teacher said that we can meditate on our love for God, whenever we feel that we love God, hold on to that love and express it more and more from your heart ("holding and expressing the love that you are"[from Love Without End by Glenda Green]), when a single emotion is expressed, our spirit will focus and concentrate on it. Finally your spirit will enter a trance and become one with God. The branch will completely connect to the Vine. Well, for basic level, praising God and expressing our gratitude to Him is also the way that we connect to the Vine and receive spiritual nourishment right away.
Faith- When we trust someone completely, we trust that person even more than we trust ourselves. God asks us to trust Him completely, to let go and let Him work His own way in us and in our life. When we trust God, we connect to Him. When we trust God, God lives in us and we lives in Him. When we trust God, we will be like Him. God can do anything, if we trust Him, we can do anything as well. My teacher said "Trust" is like "Love" in that it makes two beings connected into One. We can be one with God, when we trust in Him. It is a way that our branch will connect to the Vine. As soon as we decide to trust and believe comepletely in the Lord, tremendous joy would flow into our heart. We do not have to see before we believe, we just have to trust although we do not see it. 1 Peter 1:8-9 Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls. Miracles happen in such way. Miracles happen when we believe, when we trust...that is when our branch connect to the Vine, and we recieve "anything and everything" from Him. Luke 17:6 If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it will obey you. / Hebrew 11:1 Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.
Obedience- This means keep the commandments of the Lord. Jesus said "Follow Me" and that is what we have to do. Follow Jesus. Be good. Don't give our life to sins. Matthew 5:48 You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect. The Vine is holy, the Vine is clean, the Vine is white. If the branches are sinful, dirty, and dark, we can't connect to Him. Actually, that's the reason that Adam and Eve died from eternal life. They sinned. But Jesus has already provided the way that we can have life again. We accepted his salvation, and after that we keep His commandments. That's what Jesus said we should do. Obey Him and live according to His Words. John 15:7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. Be Good. Stay away from evil. Being holy may sound too difficult a thing to do, but we have to keep our life on one straight path in order to receive this spiritual nourishment. God will stay "in" us if we keep his temple holy. John 14:23 Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them.
Suffering- This may sound crazy but my teacher said it is for real. When we are in great pain, and we accept it with peaceful mind, our spirit will concentrate on the pain and enter a trance. The pain will no longer be painful because we share in the suffering of Christ. The pain will instead become an ecstasy. (Well, but I think this is for the high-level: the saints or those who are nearly saints) Carrying the cross is our duty. Jesus said "Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me" (Matthew 16:24) Accepting suffering is a way that we purify the soul, and when our soul is pure, the branch will connect back to the Vine. But the important thing is that we must accept everything with total surrender, without bitterness or anger, then the peace of the Lord will overflow us. The bible told us that we cannot avoid suffering if we are to live in Christ.
2 Timothy 3:12 Indeed, all who desire to live Godly in Christ Jesus will be persecuted.
Indeed,
all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will be persecuted. - See
more at:
http://bible.knowing-jesus.com/topics/Suffering,-Of-Believers#sthash.lugPRDwb.dpuf
2 Timothy 3:12
2 Timothy 3:12
The Eucharist - John 6: 53-57 Jesus said to them, “Very truly I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day. For my flesh is real food and my blood is real drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in them. This is the simplest and easiest way to connect to the Vine. The above quote should already speak for itself. Jesus has provided "Himself" so that we can have spiritual nourishment from God, that we can connect back to our Source of Life. Receiving the body of Christ in the form of Eucharist with faith and respect will nourish our spirit. If we refuse to receive Christ, then we will "wither" and "die" because we cannot escape from sin and the results of it. Roman 6:23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. As Catholic, it is best for us to get rid of our sin (death) first, then recieve Christ (life). That's why we usually go to confession before we receive the Communion.
Resurrected
Finally, I'm back from the dark. The heavy storm was over and the sun is shining at the moment. Don't know when it will rain again.
I want to record some of those darkest moment, and the thing that happened before God took me out of the tunnel.
I was hurt and I was thinking that it was so unfair and the fault was not mine.
Then I told God and He said "It's your fault."
I was so confused. The storm was going heavier. It was so dark.
I was hurt again. And God still said, "It's your fault. He did what I told him."
In the dark, all I could do is just pray and asked for God's mercy.
I really didn't understand what I did wrong.
The storm keeps growing stronger. I cried, I shouted, and I asked God
The pain was overwhelming. I felt like walking stone, no life was left in me.
But still, I kept talking to the Father.
"Please....I really don't understand. What was the thing I did that was so wrong?"
And finally, on Divine Mercy Sunday, I went to a confession
and confessed something I haven't confessed before.
Then I opened the Bible
Then I could "hear"
Then I could "see"
I understood then that it truly was my fault.
When God speaks to your heart, it was so crystal clear.
I was sorry, I repented.
I thanked God for illuminating me.
I pleaded for a second chance.
I pleaded and pleaded.
And God was so kind. God was truly a God of mercy.
On that day I lost so many tears
but my heart was full of light at last.
But Grace stayed in my heart only for a short while.
Then the last period of darkness came.
Grace was taken away from my heart.
And I was left in the dark again.
All the roads to walk seem too long.
All the things God asked of me seem too difficult.
And the promise, the hope, the second chance
was still not in sight.
I kept talking to God again and again.
I looked out the window of the building
contemplating suicide.
I thought of my parents
and called my cousin to ask about the medicine that could help
And finally God said...
Just wait....wait.....wait...
Then an idea dropped onto my head,
and I accepted it.
The craziest idea...I never thought I would have.
But God confirmed to me that it was good.
Then peace came, flowing in, and I could function at last.
I was given the choice between staying in the religion or walk away.
I was given the choice between never seeing this person again forever
or go back, be brave to admit my fault, and be meek to love and obey.
"He is my prophet." God said. "You must listen to him for the wisdom."
So I choose stay, stay and be meek.
I choose stay...stay and bend down like willow in the wind.
Then...when it's over.
The sun shines so bright as if there has never been a storm.
Some people think I made crazy decision.
But the peace that I'm having now in these two weeks confirm me.
It is the Lord's will.
I heard the Spirit said that I should change my way and be a better person.
And I obeyed.
Looking back to all of that...it was like...oh my God!
What a storm!
But You were there all along.
And now you gave me a new life.
I hear you now that you want me to continue on this road of faith.
And I will keep on trying, dear God.
As long as you keep holding my hand and leading me.
I want to record some of those darkest moment, and the thing that happened before God took me out of the tunnel.
I was hurt and I was thinking that it was so unfair and the fault was not mine.
Then I told God and He said "It's your fault."
I was so confused. The storm was going heavier. It was so dark.
I was hurt again. And God still said, "It's your fault. He did what I told him."
In the dark, all I could do is just pray and asked for God's mercy.
I really didn't understand what I did wrong.
The storm keeps growing stronger. I cried, I shouted, and I asked God
The pain was overwhelming. I felt like walking stone, no life was left in me.
But still, I kept talking to the Father.
"Please....I really don't understand. What was the thing I did that was so wrong?"
And finally, on Divine Mercy Sunday, I went to a confession
and confessed something I haven't confessed before.
Then I opened the Bible
Then I could "hear"
Then I could "see"
I understood then that it truly was my fault.
When God speaks to your heart, it was so crystal clear.
I was sorry, I repented.
I thanked God for illuminating me.
I pleaded for a second chance.
I pleaded and pleaded.
And God was so kind. God was truly a God of mercy.
On that day I lost so many tears
but my heart was full of light at last.
But Grace stayed in my heart only for a short while.
Then the last period of darkness came.
Grace was taken away from my heart.
And I was left in the dark again.
All the roads to walk seem too long.
All the things God asked of me seem too difficult.
And the promise, the hope, the second chance
was still not in sight.
I kept talking to God again and again.
I looked out the window of the building
contemplating suicide.
I thought of my parents
and called my cousin to ask about the medicine that could help
And finally God said...
Just wait....wait.....wait...
Then an idea dropped onto my head,
and I accepted it.
The craziest idea...I never thought I would have.
But God confirmed to me that it was good.
Then peace came, flowing in, and I could function at last.
I was given the choice between staying in the religion or walk away.
I was given the choice between never seeing this person again forever
or go back, be brave to admit my fault, and be meek to love and obey.
"He is my prophet." God said. "You must listen to him for the wisdom."
So I choose stay, stay and be meek.
I choose stay...stay and bend down like willow in the wind.
Then...when it's over.
The sun shines so bright as if there has never been a storm.
Some people think I made crazy decision.
But the peace that I'm having now in these two weeks confirm me.
It is the Lord's will.
I heard the Spirit said that I should change my way and be a better person.
And I obeyed.
Looking back to all of that...it was like...oh my God!
What a storm!
But You were there all along.
And now you gave me a new life.
I hear you now that you want me to continue on this road of faith.
And I will keep on trying, dear God.
As long as you keep holding my hand and leading me.
Tuesday, 7 April 2015
I lose my faith (but God wasn't mad)
I lose my faith. Period.
No need to do or say anything.
Just die when I have to. Kill when I have to.
At least I'm not the only dark souls in Hell.
Hope you all make it better than me on this planet.
....................................................................................................................................
I expected that God would gravely punish me for being hateful, bitter, and ungrateful after all the help he had given me.
But I found a passage and God in that passage spoke to me kindly like the God that I used to know many, many years ago when I came to believe in Him.
And when I asked questions, He still answered.
So...I don't know. I'll live..maybe.
I'll keep on believing that Eternal Love does exist.
The Love that continues to love even when we are at our worst self.
No need to do or say anything.
Just die when I have to. Kill when I have to.
At least I'm not the only dark souls in Hell.
Hope you all make it better than me on this planet.
....................................................................................................................................
I expected that God would gravely punish me for being hateful, bitter, and ungrateful after all the help he had given me.
But I found a passage and God in that passage spoke to me kindly like the God that I used to know many, many years ago when I came to believe in Him.
And when I asked questions, He still answered.
So...I don't know. I'll live..maybe.
I'll keep on believing that Eternal Love does exist.
The Love that continues to love even when we are at our worst self.
The Escape
If life is a roller coaster, then I wondered if I have reached the most darkest cave and the steepest slope (or even sharp drop). It has been so torturing that although I would like to smile and enjoy, but my stomach can't take it. The only thing that I can do is keep reminding myself that each roller coaster ride has an ending. Sooner or later, we'll reach the station where we can take off the seat belts, step out of the machine...and (oh I love the word) go home.
In my life I've been through a lot of prisons. School, workplace, home (when I was young), depression, addiction, and now my prisons are my physical body, misery & dark memories, codependency and ...religion.
Everytime when I'm in prison and I couldn't leave. I escape temporarily by this beautiful thing that helps me everytime. "Dream and Imagination" I fly off from this world into another world. And now I'm about to escape again...
There is a beautiful place. The sky is so blue. The sun is never too hot. And the whole land is full of pure beauty. Far at the horizon...there right there...the Eternal Love is waiting to hold me forever and we will never part again. I floated closer and closer...knowing that once I reach this everloving arms, He will hold me and will never let me go. All my dark memories will be erased, all the fear will be gone. I would no longer be locked by a name or a personality. I would be free from all prisons.
Lately, an idea reoccurred to me that I'm going to die soon. I don't have to kill myself. And I can't help feeling some peace. Death is scary but what lies behind it can be sweet.
And I will continue to dream...continue to pray. One day, it will come true. The land of freedom and the Everlasting Love who knows me and love me for who I am. I will fly there with my imagination...until the day that this body is broken.
Maybe soon...maybe very soon.
In my life I've been through a lot of prisons. School, workplace, home (when I was young), depression, addiction, and now my prisons are my physical body, misery & dark memories, codependency and ...religion.
Everytime when I'm in prison and I couldn't leave. I escape temporarily by this beautiful thing that helps me everytime. "Dream and Imagination" I fly off from this world into another world. And now I'm about to escape again...
There is a beautiful place. The sky is so blue. The sun is never too hot. And the whole land is full of pure beauty. Far at the horizon...there right there...the Eternal Love is waiting to hold me forever and we will never part again. I floated closer and closer...knowing that once I reach this everloving arms, He will hold me and will never let me go. All my dark memories will be erased, all the fear will be gone. I would no longer be locked by a name or a personality. I would be free from all prisons.
Lately, an idea reoccurred to me that I'm going to die soon. I don't have to kill myself. And I can't help feeling some peace. Death is scary but what lies behind it can be sweet.
And I will continue to dream...continue to pray. One day, it will come true. The land of freedom and the Everlasting Love who knows me and love me for who I am. I will fly there with my imagination...until the day that this body is broken.
Maybe soon...maybe very soon.
Monday, 6 April 2015
For Those of You Who Have Not Believed
It's hard for me to imagine anyone not being touched in some ways after watching this.
If you dont' have much time, you can just watch a few cases.
I found this video by accident. It shows the people from all walks of life (including a formal Muslim who were raised in an army to kill those outside of his religion.) who have gone through amazing experience, and now want to tell the world that:
Jesus is real and he can really save us. We will never ever be sorry if we believe in Jesus. It is the best decision we could do in this life. This world is not what it seems to be. Heaven is real. Hell is real. Miracles of healing are real. They are not fantasy. The spiritual realm is actually surrounding us. Our life on earth has a purpose.
As a Christian, (although I'm during a period of weak faith and going through storms of life) I want to be one of the millions and millions of people in this world who just simply want to say: Jesus is real and He is there just for us. Nothing can be compared to His love.
Enjoy the video. If you're not yet a believer, give yourself a chance to watch it, even just a bit. It is not about converting people to a religion, it is about this person "Jesus" the Son of God, and the way He showed himself to ordinary people like us around the world today and changed their lives forever.
Click here to watch: The collection of amazing spiritual experience
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